


Whenever You're Ready

by friendofspiderman



Series: Fictober 2020 [19]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Anxiety, Ficlet, Fictober, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Peter Parker Needs a Break, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Pre-Spider-Man: Far From Home (Movie), Supportive May Parker (Spider-Man), Uncle Happy Hogan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-20
Updated: 2020-10-20
Packaged: 2021-03-08 21:40:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 447
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27123301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/friendofspiderman/pseuds/friendofspiderman
Summary: Fictober Prompt #19 - "I can't do this anymore"---Peter struggles to return to Spider-Man after The Blip.
Series: Fictober 2020 [19]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1953223
Comments: 4
Kudos: 16





	Whenever You're Ready

Peter sat on the edge of his bed, staring at the Iron Spider suit as it charged.

It had been one month since the Blip was reversed.

Since he and May had come back.

~~Since Tony had died.~~

He hadn’t touched the suit once. It reminded him too much of his trip to space, where he’d lost his life temporarily ~~and watched as his mentor lost his life permanently~~.

Going back to school had been hard enough. Going back to Spider-Man felt impossible.

Putting on the Iron Spider would mean that the battle with Thanos had happened. Peter wanted so badly to forget.

But he had a responsibility.

He closed his eyes.

_If I can help, but I don’t, and then the bad things happen—they happen because of me._

He walked to the charging pod, intending to open the case and activate the suit—but he froze up instantly.

He watched Avengers turn to dust and sensed he was next. 

He felt himself falling to the ground, gripping the gauntlet as explosions continued around him. 

~~He saw Tony’s lifeless eyes.~~

He stumbled back to his bed and covered his face in his hands.

_I can’t do this anymore_.

There was a knock at his door. May opened it slowly.

“Peter?”

He looked to her with a smile that didn’t reach his eyes.

“This came in the mail for you.” She set a package on the bed next to him. “I did make dinner if you want to eat.” She bent down to kiss his forehead. “Whenever you’re ready, okay?” She closed the door gently behind her.

Peter glanced at the package—the return address, Stark Industries, made his stomach churn. But curiosity quickly won him over, and he tore into it. 

It was the original suit Mr. Stark had made him, accompanied by a note.

_Hey Peter—_

_I know you may not be ready for Spider-Man-ing right now, and you don’t have to be. You can take all the time you need. But I thought having this might help with everything. Since the old suit wasn’t salvageable, the team here helped me make another just like it._

_Call me if you need anything. You have my number._

_\- Happy_

Shaking slightly, Peter put on the mask and curled his knees into his chest.

“Karen?” He asked tentatively, worried Happy may have forgotten her in the re-make.

“Hello, Peter.” The familiar voice answered obligingly. “What can I assist you with today?”

He shut his eyes and exhaled. “Nothing, today. I have to go eat dinner with May, and I’m not really…I just wanted to say hi.”

“Enjoy your dinner, Peter. I will be here whenever you’re ready.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading <3


End file.
